Welcome to my Blog. I am Jennifer.

To begin, we have some housekeeping matters to discuss. The first of these is blog highlights. The second is blog readership. Let's see if you're even supposed to be here.


The highlights of this blog are as follows:

1. Welcome to my blog.

2. I am Jennifer.

The appropriate audience of this blog includes:

1. upper-level ESL students (at his/her instructor's discretion),

2. Jennifer (I should reread this blog and reflect on personal growth),

3. prospective employers (because this blog is an example of my writing, not because I approve of perusing blogs as an efficient use of your time. I do not. Get back to work.),

4. those acquaintances who claim to take an interest in Jennifer-oriented, Jen-oriented, Jenny-oriented (& etc.) things;

5. other readers who do not meet the above qualifications (but only upon receipt of recent headshot, resume/curriculum vitae, and a permission slip signed by a parent/guardian).


Now that we've attended to housekeeping matters and ensured that everyone's where they ought to be, let's continue the blog. We should begin with the title: "Welcome to my Blog. I am Jennifer." There is an overwhelming amount of information in the blog title.

The first sentence reads: "Welcome to my Blog." You're reading a blog. It is my blog. You are welcome to read it.

I'm glad that we're covering this information early, because I would be bothered to discover that a bewildered reader had become mired in some difficult bit of text and discontinued reading my blog. If you discontinued reading, it would bother me so much.

The second sentence states: "I am Jennifer." By this sentence, I mean that my name is Jennifer. This is confusing. Sometimes I am called other names. This is tantamount to saying that I am those other names, such as Jen or Jenny or even names that are not obvious nicknames. This puts "I am Jennifer" in a precarious space, because sometimes I am not called Jennifer. I don't know how you feel about that. You might already have deemed me to be a liar. Well, I'm not lying, but you don't have to agree with me to read what I write. I assure you, again, that I am Jennifer. And this is my blog.

In case anyone came in halfway through the blog, I'll recap. But don't depend on my egregious generosity next time:

1. Welcome to my blog.
2. I am Jennifer.